ATOP Chapter Fifty-Six

Rachel had known sorrow. Real, miserable, heart-rending sorrow, the kind of sorrow that wrung the soul and left the spirit broken and wishing for death. 

And Rachel had known joy. Joy just as real as the sorrow, beautiful, ecstatic joy, flowing over her being like a waterfall.

And now... she felt as if she had reached the pinnacle of joy. She was certain she could go no higher. This... this must be heaven on earth. 

Strange to feel such happiness when she was still in pain, so exhausted she couldn't even lift her head... but it seemed to make the joy all the more intense... all she had suffered to reach this point. 

They were all here now... everyone she loved most in the world. Emma, her dearest friend, had been with her all the way, looking almost as exhausted now and almost as joyful, still moving busily and silently around the room, setting things to rights. Dear Lynnette... Mamalein... she was in the kitchen now, Rachel had heard her pacing back and forth past the bedroom door since the moment she had arrived, finding everything Emma needed and offering loud advice in her usual gravelly voice that at the same time sounded dreadfully panicked. Rachel's precious sisters, only just returned from Jim and Donna's with Benjie in tow, gathered eagerly at the bedside. 

And Ronnie... he had never left her side for one moment... holding her hand and praying aloud when she thought the pain would kill her. Somewhere in the midst of it, she had given up being angry at him. She knew how bad he was hurting... and yet somehow, he was always strong for her. The moment it was over, she looked up at him with tortured and yet happy eyes...

"You are the greatest blessing of my life, dear heart," she had whispered.

He was holding the baby now, his eyes filled with tears. It was a boy, Emma had announced proudly as she wrapped him in a fluffy blanket and laid him in Rachel's arms. And she loved her baby with everything in her but oh, she was so tired she could scarcely hold him. And so she had handed him over to Ronnie as soon as she could bear to let him go.

"He is perfect," Rachel whispered weakly. "Is he not?"

Ronnie didn't answer, not with words. He cuddled the precious bundle close against his heart and gently kissed its tiny head. And then he bent over Rachel and kissed her too. The love in his eyes... eyes that were deep blue... she felt the overwhelming depth of it and her heart melted even more. Her joy sealed, she lay back with a sigh of relief, letting her eyes fall shut. In the haze of weariness that followed, moments before she drifted off into sleep, she could hear Ronnie's voice...

"Judah..." he was saying softly. "Judah... my son..."

"Judah Aaron," she murmured. "Gelobt sei der Herr..."

♡♡♡

"Kitchen's all cleaned up, Benjie's tucked in bed, everyone's been fed." Donna poked her head into the room, smiling lovingly at her grandson, wrapped up snugly in a tiny blue blanket and sleeping peacefully in his daddy's arms. "Except you, Ronnie-boy, you'd better eat something right away, y'hear me?" She laughed. "Lynette's cooked up enough stew for an army, and she promised to be back with a cake when you feel stronger, Rachel. Any special kind?"

"The beet cake, please, and tell dear Mamalein I love her," Rachel smiled.

"Beet cake it is, and she sends her love too. I'll head home for the night, be sure you both get plenty of rest, and remember, both Emma and I are just a call away, if you need us." she let her eyes linger a moment on the baby and then raised them to her son's face. 

"Ronnie..." she added softly, and her smile grew almost wistful. "You look about ten years younger today, my son..." and she turned to leave before he could answer.

"She's right, you know," Rachel murmured with a weak laugh.

"Hey, you're supposed to be sleeping," Ronnie chided her and she shook her head, laughing again.

"How could I sleep with such a picture as that before me? There is no sight so sweet, I think, as a father with his baby in his arms. Dear heart, your hair has turned to gold again... the gray is gone."

"It is, eh?" He grinned, running his hand through it. "Sure it's not just the light playing tricks on your eyes?"

"Very sure. I have been noticing it for weeks now... maybe even longer." She reached out to him. "Please, dear heart... stay close beside me... I need you, I need my baby."

"You need rest, and plenty of it," Ronnie protested, but he rose from his chair and laid the baby in her arms. "Promise me you'll get enough of it."

"I have no choice, laying in bed like this," Rachel giggled. "I promise I'll go to sleep, but only if you stay with me."

"I'll be here," he whispered, pressing a gentle kiss on her forehead.