The Lady of My Choosing Chapter Fourteen

 Chapter Fourteen

Tell Me I'm Not Dreaming!

    Caroline sat alone in the library but, for once, she was not reading. She did not even have a book in her lap. She sat with her head bowed, her lips moving, though no sound came out, for she was praying. In the past few months, she had found comfort only when spending time with the Lord. Without Him, she knew she would never have lived since that terrible night.

    All was silent except for the ticking of the clock. There was no light in the room except for the sunlight filtering in through the windows and the garden doors. She felt a measure of peace in all that solitude and quietness.

    All at once, the doors flew open and John burst into the room, startling her. For a moment, she was seriously alarmed for never before had she seen such a look on his face. She rose quickly but he just stood there, staring at her.

    "John!" she cried softly, motioning him back. "Please! Remember... remember..." she stopped, brokenly. He said nothing but moved towards her and knelt at her feet, taking her hand in both of his. Frightened that someone would enter the room and find them there, Caroline didn't know how to act.

    "What is it, John?" she whispered, tears in her eyes. He looked up at her and she was startled to see that he looked... joyful. Triumphant.

    "Caroline!" he cried. "Darling! I... I don't even know what to say..."

    "Please, John! We shouldn't be together at all. If the queen finds out..."

    "It doesn't matter if the queen finds out!" he was almost laughing, he seemed so happy but she was so afraid.

    "Tell me, John!"

    "Caroline... my lady Caroline... the prince... Edward... has knighted me." he paused and Caroline gasped, her eyes growing wide.

    "What did you say?"

    "Edward has knighted me." he repeated. After all the months, nay, the years of heartbreak and loneliness and sorrow... the hopelessness... the crumbled dreams... Caroline could scarcely believe his words. Trembling, she sank to her knees beside him. The whole room was spinning dizzily around her... she could feel his arms around her... and he was laughing.

    "Well, Caroline, how can I propose properly if you insist on kneeling as well? I'm afraid that's not how it's done!"

    "You really mean it, don't you?" Caroline gasped, burying her face in his shoulder. "Tell me I'm not dreaming... tell me I'm not dreaming!"

    "You're not dreaming."

    For an instant, Caroline was aware of the breach of protocol they were committing as they knelt there on the library floor, laughing and crying. But she didn't care. She wouldn't care if the king himself walked in.

    Which he most certainly did.

    And what is worse, he was followed by Queen Elinor and her attendants.

    "I say!" he cried in amazement. "This is highly irregular! May I ask what on earth is going on in here?"

    Caroline felt the blood rushing into her cheeks as John quickly stood and helped her to her feet. On encountering Queen Elinor's angry gaze, she felt again that old fear. If it hadn't been for John still holding her hand tightly, she felt certain she would have faltered beneath that gaze.

    "Caroline, I have given express instructions!" said she, icily. "Do you realize what this means?"

    Caroline searched wildly for the words to say but John answered for her.

    "Forgive me, your Majesty, I'm afraid I should have spoken to you first..."

    "And what say do you have in this matter?" she interrupted, sharply.

    "Much, I believe, your Majesty. You see, his Royal Highness has just made me a knight of the order of Saint David and therefore, set me at liberty to ask the Lady Caroline to become my wife." Caroline drew in her breath sharply and it was then that John remembered that he had not actually asked her yet.

    "Indeed!" the king cried enthusiastically. "There's an interesting turn of events for you, my dear!" he turned to the queen.

    "That" returned that worthy lady, "Is what comes from falling in love. Well then, Caroline, I'm afraid I can no longer forbid you. I suppose congratulations are in order?"

    "I..." Caroline began, glancing nervously at John.

    "Not yet, I'm afraid, your Majesty," John laughed. "I hadn't quite gotten around to asking her. You see, we..."

    "Well, get on with it, then, get on with it!" the king urged. "Let's put an end to this matter and that will be one less young person to worry about."

    From where they stood behind the queen, Lady Allison and Lady Susan exchanged glances, both trying to suppress their laughter. Caroline blushed in discomfort. She knew that within the hour the entire household would have heard the story from the chancellors down to the kitchen maids. But John had turned to her again.

    "I'm afraid I shall have to start over." he knelt again, not caring for the others in the room. Why should he care who knew it? He could have told the whole world, for the Lady Caroline would be his at last.

    "Lady Caroline, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

    Though the Lady Allison and the Lady Susan both insisted afterward that Caroline hesitated, they were much mistaken. She only paused a moment, to take in those beautiful words... the words she thought she would never hear from John. She was smiling at him, tears of joy trickling down her face.

    "Yes, John. Of course I will!"

    "It's most certainly not what I had hoped for you, dear." Queen Elinor said sadly as she approached the young couple. "But at least... at least he isn't a servant any longer. I do hope you will be happy." she extended her hand to her niece, graciously. "And," she added, "I'm sorry... that I was so harsh after the ball. I was simply worried. You do understand, don't you?"

    "Oh, Aunt Elinor!" Rather than taking the queen's hand, she threw her arms around the astonished lady. "Of course, I understand why you were worried... I understand the position you were in. And I'm sorry too... sorry that I didn't understand earlier."

    "Well, does that mean that this issue is closed?" the king asked, anxiously. "You'd think we had enough things to worry about."

    "I don't think we will have to worry about Caroline any longer," the queen smiled warmly.

    "Thank goodness for that," the king sighed, relieved. "I've had just about enough of these young people. So headstrong!" He turned toward Caroline. "I do wish you very happy, my dear. And you, Sir John. I hope you realize what a treasure you've got there." He leaned closer and continued, sotto voce. "Personally, I much prefer you for a nephew-in-law than any of those silly princes."

oOo

    At last they were able to get clear of the flurry of excitement that the situation had created in the palace and, hand in hand, the young couple slipped out to the stables.

    "I can't begin to say how much I've missed our rides!" Caroline sighed, frowning at the memory of those dreadful three months as John brought Regina out for her. She threw her arms around the mare's neck happily.

    "I missed you so much, Regina! I promise I won't ever be gone so long again." She laughed as John helped her into the saddle, then leaned down toward him. "But I missed you so much more. I don't think I'd have lasted much longer."

    "This is the start of happier days for us." John grinned as he swung up onto his chestnut. "And we won't ever be parted again, God willing."

    As she followed him from the courtyard, Caroline looked back suddenly, frowning. For a moment, she thought that she had heard the shatter of broken glass. But perhaps it was just her imagination.

    oOo

    The meadow had never looked so beautiful before as it did that day. The sun seemed to shine brighter than ever before and the birds sang more sweetly. The whole atmosphere seemed wrapped in a celestial glow. The two riders galloped across the field feeling once again that old happiness that had seemed to flee years before. It was as if heaven had opened up to shine down its light and blessing upon them. And, truly, it had.*

    Of all God's miracles, great and small, the most miraculous one of all is the one I thought could never be... God has given you to me!**

    They paused at the top of the highest summit as they had years before when Caroline had first been burdened with the dread of a political alliance and John had told her, as best as he was able, of his love. They dismounted now and walked along the edge of the woods, telling each other all the things they had for so long been forbidden to express. And, in the midst of her happiness, Caroline suddenly remembered her strange visitor of the day before. Puzzled, she discussed the incident with John.

    "She said that she heard me wish twice that there was something I could do," she remembered. "I've thought and thought about that and I remember telling Edward that I wished I could do something for him, he was so miserable. And months ago, last winter, during Doctor Tremayne's funeral... I wished I could have done something for his daughter. But how on earth she could have known that and how on earth Doctor Tremayne's daughter and Edward could be connected in any way... I just cannot understand. Perhaps I'm being foolish to think anything of it. But... my dream did come true. And she said if my dream came true that I would have the power to make someone else's dreams come true."

    "You made my dream come true," John smiled down at her.

    "That was Edward's doing, and God bless him for it," she laughed. "You know I would have said yes years ago, if it had been possible."

    She turned suddenly, as if on impulse, to look behind her. There... in the meadow... was a young girl, dressed simply. She was dancing, whirling through the field...

    "Look carefully. Don't let any little detail, any little incident go unnoticed. Appearances can sometimes be deceiving and the greatest joys hidden in surprising ways."

    As Caroline looked closer, she realized that the girl was holding in her outstretched hand a sparkling glass slipper. Caroline gasped.

    "The power to make another's dream come true!"

    The girl was the same one she had seen just last winter... Doctor Tremayne's daughter. But... she was holding the glass slipper and... at that moment, she realized that the doctor's daughter... was the Princess Incognita.

    "John!" she cried, gesturing towards the girl in the distance. "It's... it's her!"

    He turned to look also and his eyes grew wide in surprise.

    "I must fetch the prince!"

    Picking up her skirts, Caroline followed him as they ran back to their horses, galloping in the direction of the palace faster than they had ever ridden before.

**From Fiddler on the Roof