ATOP Chapter Forty-One

"Man, I thought we were never getting outta there," Ronnie chuckled as he leaned against the back of the seat, pushing his hat down over his eyes. Rachel was still waving at the crowd of people on the platform of the train station, now fading rapidly into the distance. Benjie wasn't there with them, having stayed at the farm with Josh and Emma, so her hardest goodbye had already been said and she could rather agree with Ronnie's relieved tone. Half the town had accompanied them to the station... you would think they had had enough of goodbyes after the war...! But there they all were, and keeping up a steady stream of chatter that sounded something like a roar...

"I s'pose we gotta forgive 'em for it," Ronnie added and Rachel turned from the window with a long sigh that was half relief and half regret. "The novelty of this whole situation must be pretty exciting... Although I can't believe they seriously need more excitement after what they've been through... Rach, I gotta tell you, I dread coming back... I mean, not the coming back part, just the getting off at the train station part, the poor girls will be getting quite the first sight of Jefferson... and do I have to wear this tie?" He tugged at it with a grimace, to prove his point, and then looked at her pleadingly. Rachel laughed and reached over to straighten it.

"Of course, we have to be respectable, do we not?"

"I think the word "respectable" needs a new definition," Ronnie groaned. "I see nothing wrong with a comfortable shirt and pair of jeans. I hate this suit."

"Well..." Rachel smiled. "I think you look very handsome in it," and she pressed a kiss on his cheek. 

Ronnie said nothing to that, but he didn't complain about the suit again. 

"So...." Rachel began and then looked doubtful. "This "so" is a funny word, Ronnie, am I using it right?" He only laughed and she went on. "These past few days have been so... heh, there it is again... so busy... I have scarcely had time to sit and think. I am glad to sit for a while because I need... I need to process things..." her words slowed and her eyes grew distant. She pressed a hand to her growing stomach and a sudden shadow crossed her face. With a shudder, she wrapped both arms around herself. Ronnie glanced at her in alarm.

"Are you okay?"

"Mmm..." Rachel shrugged. "It brings back the memories..."

"The baby?"

"Oh..." she made some sort of vague gesture. "Everything. My heart, it wants to believe..." she laid her hand on her heart. "But my head keeps telling me... this... this is impossible."

"I s'pose it is pretty unbelievable..." Ronnie muttered. 

"And it has been so... long..." her voice was trembling now. "I do not even know... ach, Ronnie, the camps... this... this Ravensbruck place..." she drew out the syllables slowly, disgust lacing every sound. "I do not understand what it is like. I know what you have told me, what I heard when I was in Germany and... there were so many rumors... but I was never in one of those camps myself..."

"Thank God for that," Ronnie forced the words through his teeth, his voice strong with conviction. Rachel had let her hand slip back to rest on her stomach and he covered it with his own, lacing his fingers through hers. 

"I wonder how much they have changed," she added quietly. Not if they had changed, but how much. She knew that change was inevitable. She could see them as if they were still standing there... Bekah and Shonie in the doorway of the Obermann's home. Bekah with her head held high, jaw clenched, eyes unwavering as she stared steadily ahead of her. As if she saw the future, that girl, aged beyond her years... eyes reflecting the trouble to come. The strength that she would need in those long, hard years already filling her slight frame, forging it like steel. And Shonie, so tiny, so fragile, so frail... like a little pink rose, just barely starting to bloom... her face buried in the folds of Bekah's dress, her thin shoulders shaking with sobs. So small, so precious, the both of them... Bekah strong as steel, Shonie delicate as a flower...

Rachel wrenched herself from the memory with a sob. She turned to Ronnie, clutching desperately at his coat, the terror in her eyes begging him silently for help, for comfort somehow... she couldn't speak around the pain of the lump in her throat. 

But she didn't have to speak. He understood. And he pulled her close as the train flew over the miles, leaving home far behind and an uncertain future ahead. She hid her face against his shoulder and let the tears come, glad that she could cry, glad of his arms around her. Glad that she was no longer alone. And a heart-prayer whispered deep within her... the overwhelming gratitude in the midst of this fear and sorrow... thanking God for the man at her side.

♡♡♡

The warm, enveloping fragrance of warm chocolate rushed out to greet Mac as he opened the door. Licking his lips in anticipation, he glanced around the living room to find it empty. Katie's mending basket lay on the floor beside her rocking chair and one of his own shirts was draped over the chair with a needle and thread stuck through it. Besides that, the room was neat as a pin, but not a sign of life anywhere. No cheerful voice singing, no rapid footsteps rushing to meet him. He closed the door softly, as if afraid to disturb the silence, and tossed his hat in the general direction of the hat rack.

"Lintie? Hey, anybody home?"

He crossed into the kitchen, his footsteps echoing eerily. As he had predicted, two chocolate pecan pies encircled by daintily-crimped golden-brown crusts, lay on the sideboard. But no Katie anywhere. His heart rate quickened in alarm as he searched the pantry, the back kitchen, and the garden, calling her name and getting no answer. 

"Aw, c'mon, Lintie, no fair playing hide 'n seek," he tossed his hat in frustration at the couch as he ended up back in the living room again and missed. It landed upside-down in the center of his grandmother's braided rag rug and he wrinkled his nose at it. "Mum told me your mom called her today... said t' tell you that Ronnie and Rachel arrived safe in France last night. They'll be crossing the border into Germany tomorrow, I think..."

No one answered but his own echo and he shuddered at it. This was strange... could she have gone to visit the neighbors maybe? But... she always left a note for him if she went somewhere... and there was no note anywhere...

But at last he thought of the bedroom and found her there. She was kneeling on the rug in the semi-darkness of the room, her head resting on the bed. She was fast asleep… looking almost as if she had fallen asleep while praying. Relieved, Mac stepped closer and lowered himself to his knees beside her. Almost reverently he reached out to brush the hair gently back from her face. She stirred slightly and he leaned forward to gather her close. 

His heart wrenched suddenly as he noticed tear stains on her cheeks. Why would she be crying? Was she… unhappy here, with him? He knew she was often lonely when she was at home alone, which was why she spent so much time at his shop and at his mother's house. And he was home every day for all three meals. But maybe it wasn't enough. 

He picked her up tenderly and laid her on the bed, surprised to find that she did not wake. Was she overworking herself? He couldn't let her do that… not his Katie. The house didn't have to be perfect… he would assure her of that, as soon as she woke up. And while he'd do just about anything for her cooking, he could do without such fancy meals. She shouldn't be spending so much time in the kitchen. 

He watched her for a moment and then glanced out the window at the sun with a shrug. It was only late afternoon, and he wasn't really tired, but he didn't care. He lay down beside her and pulled her close. She stirred again and smiled in her sleep, mumbling something. He barely caught the words, but they made his heart dance with joy.

"Love you… Mac…"

She sighed happily, nestling her head against his chest. He bowed his own head, resting his cheek on her hair. He knew she was awake then, as she wrapped her arms around his neck. 

"Gotta tell you something," she whispered, still drowsy.

"Mmm?"

"We're gonna have company soon."

He couldn't see her face, but he knew by the sound of her voice that she was smiling.

"Oh, really," he answered absently. "Who? And how soon are they coming?" Mentally, he was running over the things that needed doing before company came. For one thing, he'd have to finally shovel the snow on the front path... no more stalling on that... would this winter never end? It was March already and still the weather wasn't letting up. He didn't understand, or else missed completely, the meaning in her voice.

"Oh… it'll be about eight months before they come."

Eight months? Mac thought. Why… no need to worry about the yard at that rate, it'll be winter by then. Why plan for company so far in advance?

"And I can't say exactly who," Katie continued, "'Cause I never met them before. I don't even know if it's a boy or a girl."

That got to Mac. He sat bolt upright, looking nothing short of completely bewildered.

"Say that again?"

"Which part of it?" Katie grinned up at him. "Boy or girl?"

"Boy or girl..." Mac repeated in a whisper. "Katie... do... do ya mean I'm gonna... be a dad?"

The way the grin spread over her face, turning into a shining smile the likes of which he had never quite seen before was answer enough. With a whoop that made Katie start in surprise, Mac scooped her up and spun her around the room wildly.

"Agh, stop it, Mac, stop it!" Katie shrieked as she clung to him, laughing. "You'll drop me!"

This being a terrifying thought, Mac stopped abruptly and kissed her instead.